Goodbye To You

In all the time I've been keeping this blog I've realised how little people actually know about me. The fact that I seem all sweetness and light, or witty and satirical, or sometimes down right stupid when tweeting is, I suppose, nice in it's own right. In truth, things have never been easy for me. I don't want to air my grievances over blogger, because that's life, right? You have to plug on and get on with things no matter what happens, no matter what is thrown at you. It goes on.

I've just been slapped in the face again.

My nan died in the early hours of Friday morning. There is a story to tell here, but now is not the time or the place. Nan and I were close. I spent three weeks living with her before moving down to Central London in September. She took me in. She always took me in. She always looked out for me. The one person I could depend upon for guidance, cuddles, even stupid things like girlie advice, what to do with my hair. That was my nan. She was sixty nine. Not old. So back to Wales. No one wants to take responsibility for organising a funeral, being 19, I don't want to either. But I owed this woman so, so much. She was my role model in life, she cared when no one else wanted to know.

I'm still breathing, still surviving, I'm doing this for her.

So this is for you Nan, I raise my glass of diet coke to you. I hope you enjoy it, you were awesome.

For Nana Pierce, I love you.

Ave Maria

Encompass us in your light,

Your safety, and energy, so bright.

Although your time with us was spirited away

I know your free and will sing one day

Ave Maria, Full of Grace

I smile and remember the lines of your face.

Ave Maria.

An honest heart, a precious soul,

Your eyes sparkled daily, your smile was like gold,

Your hands were so gentle, and always serene

So many things that you leave here with me,

So many memories, The Lord is with thee,

Ave Maria, Full of grace

Ave Maria.

You gave me a reason to live every day,

You taught me to love, you taught me to play.

I know that your watching, please don't fade away

You'll be remembered in the sun's final ray.

Ave Maria, blessed are thou

Ave Maria.

A white feather falls from your wings,

As you unfold them and the choir sings,

The whitest of flutters, falls to the Earth,

Whispering, waiting for the hour of rebirth.

I'll love you always, My saviour

My Grace,

Ave Maria.